Oncology

I don't enjoy going to the oncologist. It's a hard day for me. 

The long drive to Bloomington. 

A flood of memories....good and not so good. 

A waiting room full of somber people. 

Trying to remember the blessings, the work of God in me. 

Trying not to cry through the whole appointment. 

I know there is good that came from my experience. I know that God used a lot of people to save my life, to encourage me through the pain, to hold my hand, to love on me. Somehow sitting here in the oncologist's office makes me emotional about all that and more. 

Joy will come. I won't be sad all day. I won't cry the whole time. There is so much for me to be thankful for. There is much to rejoice about. But this moment I am sad. This moment I am trying not to cry. And that's okay.