His Beautiful Mess

My life is but a chapter in a grand Story
Authored by Christ, all for His glory
A breathtaking epic that ends in triumph
Even that end is just the beginning

"Do you feel God has been preparing you for where you are now?"
Long dramatic pause as wheels turn in my head
'In a weird sort of way, yes.' I reply with hesitation
"God is weird. He doesn't work like we expect."

'Is it possible?' I dare to whisper
Could this be part of God's plan for me?
Perhaps I am right where He wants me to be
To paraphrase Esther 4:14b, "And who knows
but that you have come to [this job] for such a time as this?"

Every day is just that
Every day
Usual
Routine
Nothing spectacular
Nothing particularly amazing
Just living life
Trying to be faithful in each moment He gives
Each situation He brings my way

In the midst of the everyday
Is there meaning? Purpose?
Significance?
The easy answer is yes, of course
But my heart still doubts

I am on a journey to see myself through His eyes
To know Jesus deeply, intimately
To be His friend
I mess up often
I fall to my knees
It's fair to say
I am a mess

But that's only part of the truth
I am a child of God
Redeemed by His blood
He sees me with grace
He calls me beautiful
And I choose to believe
To embrace His view of me

I am His beautiful mess.